Katie, you're allowed to smirk all you want, but you are not to disclose this to anyone. Got it?? I just really needed to get this out of my brain.
So, I've been friends with this guy for several years. He's a Pastor. He's my age. He's a good man. Not bad looking, smart, funny, we largely share the same political and religious views.
We've been hanging out together for probably close to a year and a half. Effectively we've been dating, without a physical side. For the last several months I've been thinking that there was something there. But he never did anything to indicate that he might be interested in being anything more than friends.
Now, not to brag, or be too arrogant or anything, but I sort of figured that he was at one time or might still be interested in something more than friendship with me, but for whatever reason he didn't act on it. I just thought that if I made a move, he'd go along with it.
But I've been thinking that for several months now. And every time I made a resolution to say or do something, I would chicken out.
And then there was a wedding. And I thought...AH HA!! Here's a ready made event that was a little romantic and served free booze. Liquid Courage.
The wedding was beautiful, the bride had a beautiful dress, and it wasn't a strapless! It was a sweet service, and I have to admit I cried a little. The reception was really nice, mostly everyone stayed after the meal, and while there wasn't much dancing there was lots of conversation and having a good time.
So when the reception finally broke, I decided to make the move. There were several bottles of wine left after the reception, so I asked if I could take one, and they said, Sure! So I grabbed the wine and 2 plastic glasses and told him to go to the beach.
Where I proceded to get thoroughly drunk. That last bottle of wine was just more than my poor no-tolerance body could handle.
Not all was lost, though, because we managed to have the conversation, and I was probably more candid than I would have been mostly sober.
He was genuinely amazed that we had, in fact, been dating for more than a year. And I'm pretty sure I kissed him. I think 2 or 3 times. Not sure. The night gets a little fuzzy once we were on the jetty. I'm told I managed to get into the house on my own steam, which is a comfort. I used to remember every humiliating painful embarrassing thing I did the night before, but the older I get the more forgetful I get. I can't decided if it's a good or bad thing.
I know that I had a SCREAMING hangover the next day. And while it's a little sadistic, I only texted him twice during the day, and didn't go see him until Sunday, so he spent the prior 36 hours wondering if I even remembered what had happened.
He asked if he got to change his Facebook status, since we'd been dating for many months now. I said, maybe not just yet. Let's ease into this nice and slow.
So. I'm dating a Pastor. I know, it surprised all of us.
Dear God, show me the path, and I'll follow it. Amen.