Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The truth comes out...

So, finally, tonight, talking with Ex, it comes out that his mom was probably undiagnosed bi-polar, had severe mood swings and emotional outbursts, erratic, irrational, was in general hard to keep happy, etc.

He saw me over-react, and instead of seeing me, he saw him mom. He flashed to an uphappy childhood and a hard-to-handle mom, and he shut down.

FINALLY! Finally, this makes sense. So, we had a talk. A good talk, for my half.

He called before he came over, 'You're not going to be all pissed off and crying, are you?'

No, I reassured him. I have no tears in me tonight. What we needed to talk about had nothing to do with tears.

We talked about what we wanted. He agreed that we both moved too fast. We both jumped from dating to Boyfriend/Girlfriend in less than a month. I told him, and he agreed with me, that I'm happy being single right now. I love my house, and I'm not ready to move out of it any time soon. I like going out with my friends, or going to the gym whenever I want. I like that I'm not tied to anyone, or anything. The thought of walking down an aisle in a white dress right now makes me hyperventilate. He looked a little shocked when I told him, but I was quite serious. If I think too hard about it I get the heebie-jeebies.

He left on good terms. I told him when he made a decision to let me know. No hard feelings either way. I had made my case, and the ball was squarely in his court. What he does with it is up to him.
Dear Lord, there IS someone, somewhere, eventually, Right? RIGHT? Amen.

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